I read this at grandpa's memorial on Sunday. He died April 20, 2008. While he rests in peace, his memory lives on in us.
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To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Though we are all here gathered in grief today, for a man we will miss; this is an opportunity to remember and honor his life.
It’s often been a puzzle to me that we take the opportunity to tell everyone how much someone met to us after they have already passed. So one night, while my grandpa was still living, I sat down and put to paper what I would like to have him know how his memory will live with me. My wish is that everyone here can take with them 1, 2 or 3 ways that my grandfather touched their lives. All of us will have different memories, but what matters is that we have them.
I realized I could never summarize everything he had done, because he lived his life so fully. His service in the military during World War 2 where he met and later married my grandmother, the ranch he built with his brothers, the three boys he and my grandmother raised, his time spent as an outfitter and hunting guide, brand inspector, veterinary laboratory assistant – all of these achievements and so many more, are important and speak volumes of the man that he was and that we remember.
But when I took the time to reflect, what impacted me most significantly was how my grandfather spent his leisure time. Some people read about the things they want to do and see in life, and while my grandfather was an avid reader, he was a person that chose to actively pursue his many ambitions beyond the pages of a book.
My grandfather hiked miles to witness up close, the beauty of the natural stone bridges in Utah.
He hiked to the tip of glaciers in Alaska, so that he could chip ice from them and later use them as ice cubes in his evening drink.
He drove across the entire country of Canada so that he could experience the cobblestone streets of old Quebec and see the lighthouses of Nova Scotia with his own eyes.
He waited with patience and determination, for Old Faithful to live up to its name.
He hiked along dry riverbeds to find and collect fossils, geodes, petrified wood and rocks; many of which were transformed by his hands into pieces of jewellery, tables, centrepieces and other trinkets, that he shared with family and friends and even strangers.
He fished in the ocean, in lakes, in rivers and streams. He caught all kinds of fish and while he enjoyed to cast or troll from a boat; fly fishing was his most favorite.
He stopped on the side of the roads with no shoulders to climb into the ditch or onto a rock, or into the middle of highway traffic to take a picture of the mountain/rainbow/river/moose/abandoned farm in front of him.
He was a bird watcher and could mimic the sounds of songbirds in his backyard and identify those unseen, by the noises they made.
He golfed.
He learned and practiced reflexology that he then used to help soothe and relax his friends and family and even paid customers.
He sought out the opportunity to talk to people in every place he went; whether it be to a different province or country or to the local library. You may wonder to yourself how I can characterize this as a hobby – but those of you who knew him, and saw him, understand that this was part of his zest for life: constantly seeking more understanding of the people and things around him. He didn’t mind imparting his own bit of wisdom to those who would listen every now and then either (smile).
Now all of these things may not seem that important or significant – until you factor in with whom he spent the time pursuing them. First and foremost, he was with his wife, my grandmother – living and loving life actively by her side – and with his children – Stephen, Ross, and Glenn- and his grandchildren, Rob, John, Lisa, Curtis and myself. He didn’t do all these things all the time with every one of us – but I remember the time I did spend with him was in the pursuit of actively living.
My grandfather’s legacy will live on through those of us he touched. We must cherish and foster his most important lesson: to actively live; and to do so with our families and friends by our sides.
His success in life can be measured, in some ways, by his great grandson whose interest in collecting rocks and exploring nature has been instilled in him by a man that he is too young to remember. His life is impacted, because Kenneth Wallace Grant Haynes lived.
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